Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Randomize