My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
