...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
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Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
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painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
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