I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
You Will Never Meet Anyone More Annoying Than These 23 People
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.