He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I just had sex on a roof
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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