If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Randomize
