i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
