I just saw a hot homeless man
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Randomize
