she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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