Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Randomize
