that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
