guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Did I show you my penis last night?
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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