It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
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I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
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She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
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