So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
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