No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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