I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
