my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize