I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Randomize
