Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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