Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
