I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize
