Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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