sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize
