we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
