I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
