What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
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