Me too!
Where is the hickey?
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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