She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
you never un-have a 4some
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
