You were right. It hurts to walk today.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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