My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Randomize