Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Randomize
