Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
