That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I think I won the penis lottery.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
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