Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Randomize
