Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
