and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Randomize
