I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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