It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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