Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Randomize
