To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
40s are totally the cure
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
