Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
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