Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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