i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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