I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize