i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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