oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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