Christians are straight up FREAKS
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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