I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
