and you said cock pushups were impossible
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize