So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Randomize
