I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
wat bout pragnant strippers??
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
As shirtless as possible
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
